Somebody is School Shopping

... but it isn't me! For the first time in 17 years, I am not running around Wal-Mart looking for binders and pens and glue sticks and composition books and backpacks and reams of paper and Texas Instruments calculators.

I am not parked in the mall parking lot handing out $300 to each child for school clothes and shoes. (Yes, I'm a tightwad. $300 was my limit; anything over that they had to pay for themselves.)

I have not had to go to the high school and write a check for $748 for "registration and school fees" made payable to our free public education system.

BLISS! CONTENTMENT! GLEE! No apples for the teachers from me.

My Food Blog Has Launched

I'm having so much fun. However, I'm seriously deficient in available food pictures. Guess that means I'm going to have to do an awful lot of baking to build up my food porn library. I could just kiss the Captain for having bought me that camera last Christmas. I'm so happy to have it.

Oh, by the way... those of you that voted for the blog name... the winner was The Pastry Flake. Check it out: www.thepastryflake.blogspot.com.

Signs of the Times

Do you know what it means when your nieces and nephews start getting married and having children? It means you're a great-aunt. I had great-aunts. They were old and wrinkly.

Great. Just great.

I Drive... He Putts

Yep, that’s how it works. For the past seven years, I have lived a stone’s throw away from a beautiful golf course. (See submitted evidence... yes, my house is in the picture.)





However, I. Do. Not. Golf. Put me out on the scenic links and I... well... I choke. Now, put me on a miniature golf course and I’ll spank everyone else playing. That’s thanks to a teenage job at the Huish Family Fun Centers in San Diego, California. Three miniature golf courses, noisy arcade with pinball machines, air hockey tables (by the way, I’ll own you on those as well), batting cages, trampolines and bumper boats. But real live spend the day with Phil Mickelson golf? That’s another story entirely.

But take a lesson from me, folks. Don’t let inability deprive you of enjoyment. You’ll still find me out on the fairways a couple of times a month. I am an essential member of the team.

I drive the cart.

I realize the Captain appreciates help with his game. Don't think he's left to fend for himself just because I'm useless for everything except sharp turns and finding lost balls in the rough. That's why I love the golf course by our house. Management has thought of everything. They have positioned the staff to help patrons all along the fairways as well as on the greens. For example, yesterday as he approached the 18th hole, the Captain needed some expert advice on distance to the cup.




It's uncanny how the staff here anticipates your every need and shows up right when you need them.



They quickly looked things over,



conferred together



and ended up giving the Captain some great pointers.



I’m glad he took their advice. It’s a sure bet I couldn’t have helped him calculate that shot.